Maximise Your Potential

Amrit Sandhar

How Authentic are you…?

on July 5, 2013

Some time ago, I had been working with a colleague to help her with her confidence. After a few meetings, I had started to question whether my intervention was having any impact. Throughout the previous sessions with this colleague, I was looking for the ‘door’.  What do I mean by the ‘door’? There is usually something specific that you find is in the way, an impasse, which once removed, allows you to live the life you were meant to.  Despite having three meetings, I didn’t feel I was getting anywhere. It was as though there was still a barrier that I could not pass, to help my colleague. Throughout these sessions, I was trying not to get frustrated but was questioning whether anything I had could work. This was in itself causing me additional anxiety.

The next session was the turning point. I approached the situation more openly and let my colleague talk, and I listened. Suddenly, everything began to make sense. I could see what was going on and there it was, the ‘door’! In that moment, I saw her eyes light up, I felt the excitement and we both knew. At that moment, everything changed. The answer was staring us both in the face. What had happened? What had changed? That precious moment that comes when you truly listen and hear the deep truth.

My colleague had expressed how she came alive when she behaved in a more extroverted manner. She called it ‘acting’. She shared how she used to be so extroverted in her earlier years. But as she was growing up, something had obviously changed. She hesitated as I asked why she couldn’t ‘act’ now going forward? ‘I want to be authentic’, was the reply. Authenticity is the most important aspect of human interactions. We pick up immediately when someone is not being authentic with us. Of course my colleague wanted to be authentic. Yet, if you had seen her eyes light up and her expression change, something became very apparent. What she had perceived as ‘acting’ was nothing more than her connecting with her authentic self. During the time she was growing up, this extraversion had been suppressed and her mind had been convinced that she was introverted and she behaved as such. This suppression of her real self was the issue…

Living a life out of alignment with who you really are and what you feel, can lead to health problems, issues of confidence, as you go through life questioning who you really are, and an inability to relate to others, as you have difficulty relating to yourself. Follow your heart, listen to the quiet still voice from deep within, and step into the life you were made for, the authentic you…

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